So I’ve had three job interviews in three days. While I feel very grateful for the job opportunities, it has been stressful to be in Best Martha 2.0 Mode for the past 72 hours. One option is a kennel job, and the other two are horse jobs. (I grew up with horses. Yes, I am from the boonies, the sticks, whatever you call it, although I live in a major city now.)
One went very well, one went extremely well, and one went okay. The one that did okay some would say went badly. I was informed at the end of that one that I was too nervous around the horses (it had been 5 or 6 years since I had handled one), so the job wouldn’t be a good fit for me. But in my opinion, I did my best, and it seemed like a very tense barn, so the best outcome was for me to not work there anyway. It is also the furthest and most stressful drive of the three (80 mph for 50 minutes in heavy traffic). So I call it a success, even though it was a “fail.”
The one that went extremely well is the one I really think I’ll get. I’m hoping and praying on it, anyway. I loved the location, the drive, the people, the animals, the labor, the hours, the pay. Everything about it is right. The drive is the perfect length of time to listen to an average-length symphony.
I don’t write any about spiritual things on here. I am a very spiritual person. I pray. I meditate. I believe. Being so stressed and having so many options in the air has made my bonds with “the great whatever” stronger. So has being outside in the sun. My “religion” greatly involves nature and all holy texts. I can’t choose. Some people don’t agree with that, and that’s okay. It only leads to good conversation.
Anyway. So all of this is why I have been absent from here and not commenting up a storm like I usually do. But hopefully one of the other interviews ends in a job, and I’ll get out of this unemployed funk. I look forward to catching up with all of you. 🙂
Also: shout out to my lover, who has been so supportive of me. At times I have gotten downright mean from stress, and most of it lands on him. And what does he do in response? He deep cleans and organizes my apartment while I’m at my second interview, and then I came home to spotless everything. Because he is an angel. God, I love him so much. He takes all of my insecurities and warms them in his big strong hands until they don’t sting so badly. Ladies (and gents), don’t settle. Find your lover.